Weekly Inspriation 9/10

Image result for be the person you needed when you were younger

I am not sure how I have not seen this quotation until this week, but it definitely inspires me. I don’t know if it’s attributed to anyone in particular, so I can’t properly cite it. If anyone knows of its origin, please tell me.

What a fantastic edict to issue. Working with and parenting teenagers can make me feel rather helpless. I’d like to step up like a superhero, put my fists on my hips and strike a power pose. Then announce, “I am here for you, young person! How can I solve this for you?”

Of course, that would be nearly the worst thing I could do. Instead, living as a steady presence, being available, and taking the time to form a relationship with teens is a much better way to help them. If you’ve done that, you can easily step in and help in a crisis, since you’re trusted. Just showing up every day and doing something to say, “I see you there. I have noticed that you are here. You are not invisible.” makes a huge difference.

Go forth this week and be the empathetic, understanding, accepting, and kind person that you wish you’d have encountered when you were young. We’ll make the world better that way…

I found this image here https://www.creativefabrica.com/product/be-the-person-you-needed-when-you-were-young/ through a google search



How Are Teens Supposed to Transition to Adulthood?

Hi there! I haven’t been posting here at the Hippodilly Circus lately, I know, but I have been thinking, which is always dangerous. Recently, I’ve experienced something of a eureka moment, and has given me a focus for writing here, which I plan to do much more often.

In my work as a teacher and now librarian as well as my life as a parent of 20, 16, and 14 year old kids, I have been thinking more and more about the “culture of teenagers” and how Americans think about and treat teens. Most American adults think little of or about teenagers. One search on google of “Teens” returns results about drugs, pregnancy, crime, and prison. Teens in groups are nearly always seen as threatening and to be avoided. Teen’s interests: music, books, films, and activities are dismissed as frivolous and childish.

I believe that this systemic judgment of people just because they are too old to be considered children and too young to be considered adults is patently unfair and has real and damaging consequences for everyone.

This is the “big idea” that I want to address here on this blog. Having a kind of essential question I believe will focus my writing and research and help me process the frustration I feel about how teenagers are treated.


Here are some of my thoughts.


-There is no transition for teenagers in this country – formal or otherwise. Teens go from having no choices – in their classes, the way they spend their time, etc. no real autonomy, to having full responsibility for everything when they leave high school for work or college. If they do have any freedom as teens, in their time and where they go, there’s nothing for them to do. There are no “places” for teenagers. The “adult world” wants nothing to do with them and doesn’t even want to see them anywhere. With nowhere to be and not much to do, many teenagers get into trouble or break rules/laws to entertain themselves. Barring that, they isolate themselves from the adult world and relate and spend time only with other teenagers. Some turn even more inward and mental health, relationships, and their self esteem plummet.


Then, many teens are punished and judged for not having the skills and temperament to navigate and be successful in the adult world.


As far as I can tell, nobody really thinks about teenagers, except as consumers and test takers to be managed. Yes, that may be a severe way to put it, but I really think it’s true.. There is a great deal of research, time and money spent on education – i.e. content knowledge shoved into them and “managing their behavior” i.e. alternative schools, discipline, and forcible conformity. There really seems to be no effort or interest in the structures that teens have to operate within and how those structures are set up for their failure.


I mean, high school has nothing to do with life. There are no programs to guide students into managing their lives and themselves, just a list of rules and batteries of tests. Then, after graduation, there’s nothing – no outside support, no assistance with managing and navigating the world. In a society where most parents and guardians work and no adult is home full time, eighteen year olds are just expected to move out and have their worlds organized without much support and without transition time.


I also wonder if other countries or cultures have processes for transitioning their young people through adolescence. I’d love to find out.


I don’t know where this idea or interest would take me. It could be a book, a thesis, or a presentation. I don’t have any solutions, but I think that it’s important. There are likely a million different factors that have contributed to our view and treatment of teens, and I am interested in finding out about them. There are also people who fight for and with teens, and I want to find them and learn what’s working.


It’s a lot, but it gives me a focus. I can start researching and finding out what’s going on “out there” and advocating. I think it’s the rabbit hole I belong in for a while.


I would really like your input. Let me know what you think. Let me know of programs, ideas, or people who are working in this